Tuesday, December 29, 2009


I know I should be updating, but I got tagged and couldn't resist... maybe I'll update later!
1. Do you like blue cheese? no way
2. Have you ever smoked? nope!
3. Do you own a gun? yeah. well, it's more Jacob's but we have one yes
4. What flavor of Kool-Aid was your favorite? I don't remember... pink lemonade maybe!
5. Do you get nervous before doctor appointment? just OB ones.. blech!
6. What do you think of hot dogs? Gross
7. Favorite Holiday Movie? Elf!
8. Favorite thing to drink in the morning? Water or OJ
9. Can you do push ups? yep
10. What's your favorite piece of jewelry? I really only wear jewelry on dates or to church, but I always wear my wedding ring and often earrings.
11. What's your favorite hobby? exercising and scrapbooking
12. Do you have A.D.D? nope
13. What trait do you hate about yourself? mm I am a REALLY good cook, but I really strongly dislike cooking. It would be nice if I enjoyed it!
14. Middle Name? Harriet!
15. Name 3 thoughts this exact moment: When will Samantha wake up, got to finish unpacking, what's for lunch?
16. What do you read in the bathroom? Nothing. Reading in the bathroom is so weird.
17. Current Worry? if the weather will be good for our upcoming travels
18. Current hate right now? hmmm I guess I don't have one
19. Favorite place to be? With Jacob
20. How did you bring in the New Year? With family! So fun!
21. Where would you like to go? to a warm beach!
22 . Name three people who will complete this? I don't know
23. Do you own slippers? yep!
24. What shirt are you wearing? black long sleeve
25. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets? no, I like cotton
26. Can you whistle? yes
27. Favorite color? I can't pick! yellow, green, blue
28. Would you be a pirate? ha! no!
29. What songs do you sing in the shower? I don't usually sing in the shower actually
30. What is your favorite girl name? a cute one, saving it for girl #2
31. Favorite boy's name? blah, I don't know.
32. What's in your pocket right now? lint?
33. Last thing that made you laugh? Samantha, she was crazy this morning!
34. What vehicle do you drive? neon
35. Worst injury you've ever had? torn labrum
36. How many TVs are in your house? one
37. What is the best memory as a child? vacations!
38. Do you have any pets? nope :( when we move we will get a dog for sure!
39. Does someone have a crush on you? I guess Jacob does
40.Your favorite books? Too hard to choose a favorite. I'm currently reading Catching Fire (amazing!!!!) and The Lovely Bones (very interesting)
42. Do you collect anything? No. I strongly dislike clutter
43. Favorite sports team? BYU cougs!
44. What song do you want played at your funeral? I don't know! My favorite hymn is All Creaturs of our God and King, but that isn't really a funeral type song
45. Who do you tag? I tag... Katrina, Briana, Hilary and Ang

Friday, December 18, 2009

Off to the Golden state!

Tonight we are leaving for CA! woohoo!! Going to have a very sunny and warm Christmas (WEIRD, but still fun!) We are excited! Hopefully our plan to drive all night so that Samantha will sleep the whole way is a success!!

Thursday, December 10, 2009

Santa Baby....

I had to take pictures of Samantha in her Santa costume for... well something (it's a secret) anyway she looks so cute, I had to post them!

Monday, November 30, 2009

slightly fixated...

I am so bored of being fixated with things that don't matter. The main thing I am talking about is my weight. I'm so sick of it. It's tiring to always be worried about it and always worry about not eating too much and eating the right things and making sure I exercise enough and blah blah blah... I am going to make a bold statement, not because I am self centered but because I believe women need to change their perspectives, and I honestly feel that every woman should be able to boldly declare this about themselves: I look great!! And know what? I do! I am the same size I was when I was 15--- 15!!!! I was bigger at 16 than I am now! And I wasn't fat at age 16. I was fairly slender. So why the fixation? I am completely clueless. I think I have been fixated and obsessed to some degree or another since I was 12. And I'm not talking about eating disorders, luckily I have always been able to keep myself out of those (though there have been a few times that have been close). That's a tiring thing to be obsessed with for over a decade! Feeling the pressure and desire to achieve perfection.
It dawned on me recently that there is no perfection physically. It all has to come from within. You cannot ever achieve perfection with yourself physically until you learn to love yourself. You have to reach a point mentally where you feel good about yourself. I believe that in order to reach that point, you need a few key elements. One is that you need to be physically active. I'm not saying go kill yourself at the gym (unless you like that sort of thing) find something you like to do that's active and go do it. I always feel better about myself on days when I am physically active. I think you also need to be at a point where you are eating well. Eating well is different for everyone, but there are a few key factors, one of them being at a point when you know enough is enough and not overeat. Think about how you feel after you overeat- not good, huh? And the other is moderation in all things. I'm not saying you have to have 3-5 servings of vegetables each day to love yourself. I'm also not saying stay away from that cheesecake or french fries. All I'm saying is moderation in all things. Don't eat the cheesecake or french fries too often, but still eat them, if that's what you want.
OK, so I think I've figured out these few keys to be at a point where you can just feel good in general. But I feel like there is still more that needs to be done from within. You need to reach a point where these things happen, not because you stress about them, but because it's part of your life.
One time I was talking to a friend about his future career and he told me that he wanted enough money that he didn't have to worry about it and be stressed about it, but not be at the point where he always wanted more materialistic possessions, and felt like he had to "Keep up with Joneses"

I think that trying to achieve this physical perfection and satisfaction is a form of 'keeping of with the joneses' and I want to achieve this middle ground he spoke of!
I feel very strongly that our Heavenly Father loves us no matter what. I also feel like He wants us to love ourselves. We can do a lot better serving others and the Lord if we first learn to love ourselves. I also feel that He wants us to be healthy and strong, but not obsess over it or worry about it too much. I think He wants us to be able to find that middle ground where we are healthy, but not worrying about it too much. He doesn't care if we have love handles or stretch marks or big hips or cankles! He wants us to be healthy and happy, and sometimes some of those things I mentioned do come along with being in good health!
Another point I would like to make is that I think the Lord wants us to be able to give our children a healthy outlook on life. Our poor little daughters (and sons too, though maybe not as much) receive so much pressure from outside sources that they don't need that in the home too. I think about how I don't want Samantha to feel at an even younger age than 12 that she has to be thin! She doesn't need to see her mother standing in front of a mirror pulling on the fat on her legs and complaining about her weight. She needs a mother who will simply be a good example of not overeating and staying active. Not a mother who pressures her and tells her she is eating too much and needs to exercise. I'd like to add that on the other hand that He doesn't want us to be obese and either.

Anyway this has kind of been on my mind a lot lately. And I feel that recently too many of my thoughts and conversations are about being healthy and losing weight, etc. And I think it has become degrading. I'm so tired and bored with this obsession. It isn't healthy (ironic that I'm fixated with health and it isn't healthy.. yeah) and I want to stop. I'm not claiming that I'm suddenly going to stop and become perfect at it, but I am going to start trying. I want to focus my energies on something more positive.
OK, for all of you who made it to the end of this really long post please say aloud with me "I am smokin' HOTT!!!"

Friday, November 13, 2009


Well things have been going well for us lately. I don't get to see Jacob as often as I'd like, because he is so busy with work and school, but oh well. Samantha is... well a toddler. She gets into everything and loves to tear apart the house, I spend most of my time cleaning these days :) She has a few words that she says, 'daddy' 'bye' 'ball' (ball means toy to her) and a few other things that all mean "what's this" and some other things I can't think of at the moment. Her newest thing she can do is open things. For example, i have a concealer that's in a tube like a lipstick, and she can now pull of the lid, and she pulls of the lids on my chapstick and anything else that you just have to pull to take off the lid. She has a really fun little personality and is still so friendly to everyone! She loves to cuddle and still loves reading books.
This Thanksgiving Jacob has to work Wednesday and Friday so we will just be staying here. Starting that weekend the place where he works will be closed on Saturdays, so we are really excited to actually be able to go places on the weekend if we want!
Oh! and Samantha is officially weaned and finally loves whole milk in her sippy cup!

Halloween 2 weeks late...

I know I'm late, I just haven't been in the mood to blog lately.
Our Halloween was soooo much fun! on Friday we went to a FUN Halloween party hosted by our good friends the Durrans (they are the ones we dressed up with as The Flintstones).

To Nicole From Jacob

First of all, this says it was written by Nicole. It wasn't. I just couldn't remember what my login information was.

Anyway. It is 6:50am and I am sitting in the Eyring Science Center on BYU campus working on homework. I was thinking about all that is going on in my life with school and work and family, and much Nicole really does for me and our little family. Nicole, I hope you really know how much I truly love you. You do so much that I don't ever see (or just don't notice). In know I am not very good and making life easy for you. I'm sorry for that. I really do appreciate you staying home with Samantha to take care of and teach her.

You mean everything to me dear. I wish there was some way to really let you know exactly how I feel about you. You give me so much strength, and sometimes I feel like I just drag you down. Thank you for being my wife and my support. I honestly don't know where I would be without you. I know this little note won't make up for all of the stupid things I do on a regular basis :) but I hope that it lets you know, at least in some small way, that I love you with all my heart. I hope your day is going well when you read this, and if not, that this makes it a little better.

I love you Nicole!

-Your adoring husband

Monday, October 26, 2009


Weaning.. who knew it could be so difficult?? It makes having Samantha cry it out seem like a breeze! I have tried literally everything I've thought of and others' suggestions (don't bother with new suggestions for me please, I've probably already tried it) besides quitting bottles cold turkey and nothing has worked. So, I think this is it. I think I have to quit cold turkey. UGH she is going to be such a monster the next few days. The thing is, the longer I wait the worse it will be. I just need to take a DEEP breath and do it. As I learned with letting her cry it out, you have to be 100% diligent or it's completely useless and sometimes can make things even worse. Here's hoping I have enough will power to not give in! please pray for us.

Friday, October 23, 2009

Craigo's meets Provo!!

I spent my high school years going to Craigo's pizza in Rexburg. It was soooo yummy, and a pretty good price! After I left for college, Craigo's expanded, moved and turned themselves into more of a restaurant (I don't really know how to describe what they were before, they were a restaurant but I guess it was more like a pizza joint, sometimes there were live bands and other things, it was pretty cool) they expanded to some other towns in Idaho, and a month or 2 ago I saw a sign that they were coming to Provo!!! I was thrilled and we had to try it out! We went this afternoon, and I was definitely not disappointed! Go try it out everyone, Craigo's is amazing :)

OHH! BUT it's called Pizza Pie Cafe here and it's in the Albertson's parking lot across from Olive Garden.

Monday, October 19, 2009

364 days

Tomorrow Samantha will be 1 year old. I can't believe it!! Last night I was marveling at where I was exactly 1 year ago. 1 year ago (yesterday) was a Saturday, I had my baby shower and it was sooo much fun, I loved it. I remember explaining to everyone about my cholestasis and how they were probably going to induce me later the next week (Thursday or Friday). I had NO clue that when I went in for my checkup on Monday, they were going to say "OH! Today you are 37 weeks? Well, we better get you to the hospital to be induced" I was terrified, Jacob was at school, so I went and picked him up from school and we went over (HA, I drove myself to the hospital to have her:)) They wanted to give me an amnio, but wanted us to sign this waver saying how it wouldn't be their fault if it sent me into labor and the baby could die, and the amnio would be really painful, I remember reading it, and Jacob and I looked at each other and were like "we are NOT signing that!" when the doctor came in to talk to us about it she gave an ultrasound and thought Samantha looked fine and an amnio wouldn't be needed (in my head I was like 'good, cause I'm not getting one anyway!'). They started the pitocin around 2, I started feeling contractions around 3:30, and she was born at 10:43.

The last year has been a busy one and a crazy one, with a lot of ups and downs and life's lessons. Samantha is walking everywhere, eats most everything, has 4 1/2 teeth (1 keeps cutting then going back up, depending on the day she has 4 or 5) with another 1 1/2 coming in. She is very friendly, she hardly ever cries when other people hold her, but will cry when mom and dad hold her. She loves making messes and is already all girl (how do I deal with that?? I was the biggest tomboy when I was little- I even cut my hair like a boys!!!) she likes to watch me do my makeup and will grab things around her and act like she is putting makeup on. She loves bows and jewelery and clothes and shopping.
We are looking forward to the years to come with her, and adding on to our family sometime in the next couple of years. I'll admit I'm a little scared to be pregnant again, and worried about getting cholestasis again (now that I've had it, I have about a 70-90% chance of getting it again with each pregnancy), but life is good and we are so happy!

Thursday, October 15, 2009


I am OFFICIALLY over my baby hunger. (yay!) I was reminded recently of how wretched it was to be pregnant (sick for 34 weeks straight (hypotension and restless leg syndrome in addition to nausea), then 1 week of not being sick, then stupid cholestasis) and decided I want to wait. Part of me wants to just get it over with and not delay the inevitable, but I think I'm content to not be pregnant right now.
Jacob's family (my family too!) came to visit over conference weekend, and since they live in California and wouldn't be here on the 20th for Samantha's first birthday, we decided to have a little party for her 2 weeks early.

We had a lot of fun while they were here and can't wait to see them again for Christmas! Thanks for the presents, Samantha loves them!

Tuesday, October 13, 2009


It's official. I am baby hungry!!!!!!! Haha, I know I'm crazy, but there is such a huge part of me that yearns to be a mom again! It's going to be awhile though, because I refuse to spend months 5-9 of pregnancy during the summer months (summer of 08 was by far the most miserable summer I have ever experienced) so don't get any ideas!!

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Fun news!

Well, Samantha has decided to just start walking today! I keep turning around to see her walking somewhere with a HUGE self-satisfied grin on her face, it's really cute! She has fallen probably 10 times in 10 minutes, so we'll see how long it lasts! She made the decision at the perfect time, since her grandparents will be in town tomorrow until tuesday!
On a not so fun note.... she is cutting 4 (that's right FOUR) teeth right now- blech.

Monday, September 28, 2009

Dreaded Mondays no more!!!

I have often had a bad attitude towards Mondays- they usually mean that much longer until the weekend when I get to spend more time with Jacob. But last night and this morning I have decided to become a lover of Mondays. Why?

Mondays (for me at least) determine how my week will go. The last few months I have been working out in the mornings 4-6 days a week. Last Monday, I didn't feel like it, so I didn't. I think I only exercised twice last week (and only one of those was a tough workout), and it was truly a miserable week. I didn't get as much done during the days, I didn't feel as motivated to do things. Friday rolled along and I realized how gross I felt. I just felt so disgusting, from going to working out so much to hardly at all. I just felt so 'soft' and Blech! Last night I decided that I would definitely work out today and every day this week, and oh what a great decision! It's 10 am and I have already worked out, showered, gotten ready for the day, dishes are done, the floor is cleaned and vacuumed, AND I've been taking care of and playing with Samantha! I feel so accomplished!
Mondays are no longer dreaded, instead they are a chance for a new beginning, to start over and make something of myself and improve from last week!

Friday, September 18, 2009

First pigtails and our little climber!!

Her first pigtails! Sorry it's blurry, I took it wiht my phone!

Some funny lookin hair post-piggies

Lately every time I turn around for 3 seconds, I find her climbing on top of something!

She loooves to climb! Notice how proud of herself she looks in these two pictures?

On top of my scrapbooking stuff

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Labor Day

For Labor Day Jacob and I went to Idaho to visit my fam. While there we went to Big Springs and Mesa Falls. I took so many pictures I put most of them on here really small sized- if you want to see them big, just click!

This is the Johnny Sack cabin (at Big Springs).. The guy who built it was onyy about 5'3 or so and the cabin is just miniature. When you look inside the windows all the furniture and stoves are sooo small!! It's really cute!

My mom and I by a door at the cabin

This fish was HUGE! A Rainbow trout estimated at well over 20 pounds.

A momma moose and her baby!


My 17 year old brother, Mat

Grandpa, Grandma and their grandbabies

Ang and Mike

Grandpa and Landen

The lower falls

And of course, you can't go to Idaho and not see a phenomenal sunset.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Stewart Falls!

A week ago Jacob had the afternoon free so we decided to hike up to Stewart Falls. It was Samantha's first time in the pack, and she looooooved it!! She spent the first 2/3 of the hike in squealing, singing, and giggling, it was really adorable :)

When we got there I climbed up to the top of the first tier and took a few pictures:

I climbed down to find daddy and his little girl just hanging out!

Samantha had so much fun just playing!

The hike back was beautiful and some of the leaves were already starting to change colors!

Samantha had so much fun she fell asleep on the hike back....

We had a lot of fun and are planning on going again in early October when all the leaves have changed colors!!