Friday, October 18, 2013

Lessons in Judging

2 months ago during Jacob's semester break I learned a couple of lessons in judging others. The first happened when I went with the girls to get  a pedicure. We went  to a beauty school (ya really can't beat the price!).  The girls that were doing our pedicures came to greet us and one of the girls had a buzzed head with a slight faux hawk.  She wasn't dressed "immodestly", necessarily, (maybe slightly, but not at all trashy or sleazy looking) but you could totally tell she had fakies.  I inwardly rolled my eyes, thinking she must be "expressing herself" when in reality just trying to find herself.  Come to find out I was totally wrong.  The young woman had just finished battling breast cancer, and had only been back at school for 3 weeks.  Hence the buzzed head and implants.  I felt really bad.  I kept thinking over and over how your really don't know anyone's story, and it's so unfair to judge them.

The following day I had my second lesson in judging.  So here in WV our temple is a little over 3 hours away. By the time we go down, take turns doing sessions, eat something and come home it's easily a 12 hour day. And with Jacob putting in around 80 hours/ week into school (8ish hours on Saturdays), we don't exactly get to go every single month.  Anyway, during Jacob's semester break we made it twice! Only the second time I was THAT person at the temple... the one with the cough.  I remember when we lived in Provo I would feel frustrated when people would come to the temple that were obviously sick.  I didn't go to the temple to get sick! It was easy to take temple attendance for granted there.  Being able to go whenever I wanted, I selfishly thought it was selfish of them to go when they were sick.  Anyway, I wasn't super sick or anything, I just had a cough and it wasn't a nasty mucous-y cough, just a dry annoying cough.  If it had been "productive"or if I had been all snorty or runny and gross, I would NOT have gone, but I just had a cough and it had come from a teeny tiny summer cold! It taught me a lesson in judging others. We really don't know people's circumstances.  My heart ACHED to go to the temple. I really missed going, and I couldn't bear to pass up another opportunity to go, especially knowing it would be awhile until we could make it again. Lesson learned: Don't be annoyed by sick people at the temple. You have no idea what they have been through to get there, or what their circumstances are.  That being said, if you're sick and it's EASY for you to get to the temple and you are able to go often, just think about it before going. If you need it- go, if you can wait a week- then wait :)

1 comment:

Katrina said...

love that you posted this.

It's so true that we don't know people behind the outside layer. Good reminder.

(I had to laugh a little about the temple perspective because Ryan told me he had a similar perspective with bringing kids/families late to sacrament meeting when he was a teenager. Then...he had kids of his own and well...we don't always walk into sacrament with our 4 kids on time--and he now knows why all those people he judged were coming late. You do what you have to when it is important.)

Good job getting to the temple twice! :) I'm impressed. Our temple is 45 mins away and getting there makes it a 5 hour or so trip... that's hard enough. I'm impressed with your efforts--even with a cough! :)

miss you guys!